Classic words from the show American Idol... While we watched through the episodes of the auditions I even stated on Twitter - "I think American Idol should be renamed "I Want This So Bad... PLEASE!!!"" Now I must confess I'm new around the whole Idol craze. I've only watched the last two seasons on account that my wife pretty much will watch whatever I want to watch (Hitchcock, Scott, Cameron... my classics craze I'm on lately) and I felt like I should watch shows she likes too... now I'm kind of hooked watching it.

Since watching the idol auditions and seeing these people beg and plead on stage when they clearly, CLEARLY, have no singing talent whatsoever, I think 1) "Wow, they're mom must be REALLY encouraging" AND 2) "I wonder how much time that person has actually put into their craft."

What you want tomorrow, you need to work for today.

You won't get anywhere in life if you're not willing to work for it. I look at my FilmAds stuff and wonder what people think. We have some big news coming up and it's going to be amazing, but I've been working at this for over 3 years. It's been difficult, time consuming, headache filled, poor, really great/bad at times and some times rewarding BUT I've had to put the time into it. I had to fail, try again, fail, get fired, try again, fail and try again. To be honest, I've probably doubted myself more than I've believed in myself.

When I see people on idol say PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, right away I say "Don't beg" It won't do you any good. Nobody wants to hear you beg. I think the idol judges should have some loose change and throw it at the contestants when they do that. Secondly, when the people say "I want this so bad" I wonder what they did the day before to show they want it. What did they put into it to show they want it SO BAD...

I look at my life and my goals. I want to get into bigger productions, but what am I doing right now? (Besides complaining about other people not doing anything...) I study how movie's market themselves. I look at costs and lengths of time to get things done. I watch movies and see how they move the camera, position the actors, set up lighting. I watch Behind the Scenes stuff. I read books, blogs, watch online tutorials, I talk about it, etc. I put in the time today for what I want tomorrow. I keep questioning myself if I'm doing enough. The day I stop doing that will be an indication I shouldn't be doing this anymore.

I want this SO BAD, you just won't hear me say that.


Matthew A. Hawkins