Just Something

I don't get too personal on my blog.I share about my journey in production, but truth is, life happens to all of us.

Here's my life in the last month and for weeks to come: Each morning I wake up to two boys climbing into my bed and wanting to immediately go downstairs. They have one thing on their mind: food. More accurately, cereal and milk. From there it's onto wearing the days batman and robin capes and playing with action figures and cars. I rush quickly to get showered and dressed and to check that Deb can make it downstairs ok. She is 13 weeks pregnant right now and feeling very ill. Poor girl. My boys say that to her too now. I go to work. I always have my family in the back of my mind. How are they? Are the boys fighting each other? Is Deb hurling? My work, is work. It can be very rewarding, but to be completely honest, it's not always that much fun. I go home either on the bus or in a car that sounds like a bus. I never know what to expect when I open the door when I get home. Will there be any carpet visible? Will the kitchen still look like a kitchen? I think I struggle with OCD. Messes and me don't get along very well. At all. I clean up, air out the house (Deb can't do smells too well right now), it's freezing. I either 'make' supper or I actually make supper. Deb and the boys come home. Debs been working and looks like she will keel over. The boys are hungry and want to wrestle. I get them for 2 hours to eat, play, read, watch a show, wrestle, bedtime stuff and then wrestle some more. My favorite time of the day right now is when the two boys demand I cuddle with them before they each go in their own beds. Two boys laying on my chest. We pray together. I pray they will be good men. I pray God's hand to watch over them. We have kisses and I scoop them into their beds. (The came up with the word scoop, not me). I go downstairs and clean up again. Deb is either laying on the couch or in bed. Poor girl. I open my laptop and do work. I still run Hawkins Media and am looking to get some new initiatives running. For the first time since I can remember, I'm not feeling overly motivated. I look around. I imagine what I want for my boys. What I want for my wife. I would do anything for my kids. I would give them whatever they needed when they needed it. I know I'm a suck for them. They just show me those eyes and big bottom lip and I give in. I just want to be a good dad. My wife makes me want to be a good dad. Not MAKES makes me, but the two boys she gave me and her love for me and them, make me want to be a good dad. If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have two amazing boys. I wouldn't have a third kid on the way. Those are my days right now. Some days its overwhelming and feels like it will never stop. Other days are so rewarding and fun. Today was one of those days: