"Computer Issues" - Matthew A. Hawkins

The other day my friend Jason and I were nerd talking and thought of some common computer issues people have and some ways to resolve them, here's just a few: 1) When something goes wrong with your computer, it MUST be the computers problem, after all YOU installed the software YOU'RE using and YOU tried doing whatever YOU did and well YOU'RE the one wanting the computer to do what YOU want it to... yes, the computer is to blame.

2) Referring to #1, use the rule of PEBCAC "Problem Exists Between Computer And Chair"

3) If using #1 and #2 don't work, just jiggle the chord. It MUST be the chord.

4) Yell COME ON! at the computer.

5) Apply stapler (or equally large office item) to the temple of your forehead.

6) Call a random person that has computer knowledge and rant to them about #1 and let them know you're talking to them because the inanimate object called their computer will not respond to their death threats.

7) Blame the advance in technology. You have probably said, "Well computers change every month and I bought this 6 months ago so my computer is so out of date now." Yes! Advances in technology have caused the issues YOU have with YOUR computer.

Numero Eight) Windows Vista

9) Perhaps you recently bought your computer HERE.

10) TRY THIS

Bonus - I have never tried any of these things... they do not come from personal experience, really, the don't, honestly, I mean it. Yeah, not from my life.